What is mediation?

In mediation, two or more parties work with a neutral third party (the mediator) to share their viewpoints and gain understanding of the other party’s experiences. It is generally a short-term, structured, task-oriented, and hands-on process. Mediation has become an increasingly common way to settle all kinds of conflicts, from neighborhood property disputes and workplace disagreements to parenting plans and even complex multi-national issues. It is popular because, among other reasons, it encourages dialogue and collaborative decision-making.

What is relationship mediation?

Relationship mediation is a newer field. It is intended for people whose relationship is facing challenges and want to salvage and heal the relationship, not simply get the conflict settled and then go their separate ways. Spouses/partners, family members, friends, and even business associates can benefit from this kind of mediation.

In relationship mediation, we look at the underlying needs, and I guide you to develop strategies to get those needs met. It is rooted in the present and focused on the future. By working together, we can uncover major solutions that you can implement yourself and revisit as needed, ideally before a crisis point is reached again.

How is this different from couples or marriage counseling?

Couples counseling sessions often spend a lot more time unpacking the past. Couples therapists use different techniques for re-establishing the relationship and might also diagnose underlying issues.

Are you a therapist?

No, I am not a therapist. I’m classified as a coach. I deeply respect the work of therapists and have benefited from their services many times. I will recommend therapy to clients when situations from their past are creating challenges in the present, and I think they would benefit from exploring them.

How long is a mediation session?

Mediation sessions are 90-minutes long. One-on-one conflict coaching sessions are 60-minutes long.

How many sessions are usually needed?

It depends on the complexity of situation and where you and the other person are at. It usually takes four to eight sessions to fully listen to each other, explore needs, and come up with future strategies. Sometimes clients will return for refresher sessions or to be guided through a particular situation, and I welcome that.

Are your sessions held in person or virtually?

The majority of my clients have their sessions via Zoom. You can also have them in-person at my home in the Brookland neighborhood of Washington, DC.

Are there limits to where you can practice, like only in particular states?

No, there aren’t. As a coach, I can work with clients from anywhere in the United States or even the world.

Do you accept insurance?

No, I don’t. Health insurance does not cover coaching.

What does the name of your business mean?

Tower & Star Mediation is a reference to the Tower and Star cards from a tarot deck. The Tower card represents chaos, destruction, sudden upheaval, and unexpected change. A Tower event can be like a bomb going off in your life. Those events could be positive, like the birth of a baby, or negative, like losing a job. Some events, like a relationship crisis, have the potential to go in either direction.

The Star card, which appears directly after the Tower card, indicates hope for the future, inspiration, calm, stability, and contentment. The Star is positive and indicates spiritual connection.

My goal is for the relationship mediation and conflict coaching that I give will lead you from a place that might include fear and unwanted change into a state of peacefulness, connection, and growth.